Tuesday, January 16, 2007 Y
i got a lot of gan chu..
i got a moodswing..
a very serious one..
i dun feel like going sch..
i know this is not purely a moodswing, i do know the reason.. or reasons behind it.. but how can i solve it? i have no idea.. becoz i duno whether it is juz partly my thinking, or izzit both also at fault?
or mayb there is nth at all? mayb i'm too petty? mayb i'm too hurt?
i start to have doubts.. on myself.. am i a gd fren? do i reali know wat a gd fren is supposed to know? supposed to do? will close frens take each other for granted..? izzit becoz u treat that person as gd fren den u will show ur true colours? i mean.. ur moodswings, ur attitudes, the way u handled things, the way u think, ur actions or watever, juz ur true self..
i c the changes in you.. i do have changes in myself too.. is the change gd?? i'm not sure.. mayb i'm not used to ur changes? mayb i'm not able to accept ur changes?
i start to feel that, i have no wher to vent my frustrations, to vent my anger, to vent my sadness.. not even here..
i dun feel like confiding in anywher, anyone..
i do have probs.. i do have troubles.. but i also hafta face everyone with a smile ya..
i have limits too.. once ok.. twice ok.. but everytime.. i'm juz feeling tired.. i juz wanna have some time to think.. mayb i'm not a reali gd fren? mayb i need to improve? mayb i should do wat a gd fren should do? mayb i dun deserve u? mayb i should juz reflect..?
mayb i should juz be independent..?
~ xin suan ~ xin teng ~
becoz of 2 ppl..
i duno wat are ur views towards me.. i duno.. i need assurance.. if not, i will start to hu si luan xiang, den no solutions = drift..
mayb i shouldnt blog at all..?
10:14 PM -
hearts